Saturday, January 10, 2009
THIS IS WHY YOU DON’T TAKE MEN TO THE STORE WITH YOU
After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on
her trips to Target. Unfortunately, like most men, I found
shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally
unfortunately, my wife is like most women — she loved to
Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from
the local Target.
Dear Mrs. Samuel,
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing
quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this
behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the
store. Our complaints against Mr. Samuel are listed below
and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them
in people’s carts when they weren’t looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off
at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor
leading to the women’s restroom..
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an
official voice, ‘Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a
bag of M&M’s on layaway.
6. August 14: Moved a ‘CAUTION – WET FLOOR’ sign to
a carpeted area.
7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and
told other shoppers he’d invite them in if they would
bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.
8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he
began crying and screamed, ‘Why can’t you people
just leave me alone?’
9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and
used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting
department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants
11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while
loudly humming the ‘Mission Impossible’ theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his
‘Madonna look’ by using different sizes of
13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people
browsed through, yelled ‘PICK ME! PICK ME!’
14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud
speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed ‘OH
NO! IT’S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!’
And last, but not least.
15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door,
waited awhile, and then yelled very loudly, ‘Hey!
There’s no toilet paper in here.
Friday, January 9, 2009
Disclaimer: If a tax auditor is reading or reviewing this data note that all information in this blog is for entertainment purposes only! LOL!
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
I know the economy is in a rough place right now so was also thinking hey maybe I should destash most of my stuff cuz I need the money with no job and then just start fresh when things are more financially stable. Then I had an EPIPHONY MOMENT and thought Hey why not try doing some traveling trunk shows? I send my jewelry with a friend to work or home, they get orders and customer names and I am not spreading myself thin trying to travel to and fro to make sales. I did my first traveling trunk show with my friend Patti who took it to her school and she made $60 bucks. Hey better than nothing. I went to a close friends house this weekend to have her take it to her job and she bought $60 worth on the spot, kept it all and took it to work with her today and so far has about $30 in sales. Hey that aint too bad. So all that said, I am just playing around with different venues and ideas and trying to figure out what I am doing and can do to bring in ACTUAL income!
Know that I miss all of my Etsyblogger team members and my Pluggers United Team members and hope to be back online full force soon!
Huggles to all of you!